King Of Avalon lyrics - Dan Bull

(King Arthur's Rap)

The prophets say today is a historic day

As we're marching through the forest glade straight as the most honest blade

Across your heart, you've made a promise, break it and you're going to pay

Arthur's dead not gone away, put some respect on his name

The ancient scriptures tell of a King who came to lift Excalibur

This is a man of a different calibre, ready to rip any challenger

Daring to enter within his parameters, they're going to witness calamities

He isn't just keeping his kingdom, he'll even be shifting realities

With a plan to silence any dissidence and damn defiance

He'll blow your grand alliance to the wind like Dandelions

Some of us are warlords, some are more man of science

Some will summon up all manner of abominable dragon giants

No man is an island though, we'll have to plan as an allegiance

Tighten up those fractured ties by marriage of convenience

Our empire's a garden and we're gathering ingredients

Our partners will comply by either treaty or obedience

Should they have a grievance with our agreements, they can bring it to the King

Whereby the King will bring his edict and believe me it'll sting

March quickly, our city's

Beating heart's being torn out of history

March deftly, directly

Into the path of our arch nemeses' siege

March briskly, our city's

Beating heart's being torn out of history

March swiftly, march with me

We lead the charge into war seizing victory

Try and put a sword to the Sorcerer Morgana

You're sure going to be sore in the morning a Mordred with more mana

A raw heart torn apart, we stormed the castle wall at last

Foresaw that Arthur would be reborn or is it all a farce?

It's not an area for librarians or parlamentarians

It's far scarier when you're embroiled with barbarians

So don't sleep without a shield, don't leave a ploughless field

No, don't even scout if you're not out to feel pounding steel

See you're sweating, your feet are dragging, I can see you're that reluctant

To meet my dragon, the medieval weapon of mass destruction

I give the order: invade and ignite, calling forth flame from the sky

'Til they who lie beyond the horizon spy your city ablaze at night

March quickly, our city's

Beating heart's being torn out of history

March deftly, directly

Into the path of our arch nemeses' siege

March briskly, our city's

Beating heart's being torn out of history

March swiftly, march with me

We lead the charge into war seizing victory

From Avalon to Babylon we vow to battle on

Clap back against the Saxons, sacking any town we happen on

Leave one inhabitant alive with a battle cry to pass along

Give up the fight or you'll have to die, slain like the track I rap upon

All you can do is clap along, it's K.I.A, high five

K.O.A, they came to claim my prize? Nice try

They who invade our castle feel regret, whoever tries

They may have slain King Arthur, but legends never die

March quickly, our city's

Beating heart's being torn out of history

March deftly, directly

Into the path of our arch nemeses' siege

March briskly, our city's

Beating heart's being torn out of history

March swiftly, march with me

We lead the charge into war seizing victory

KSI Rap Roast (Rap Roasts #4) lyrics - Dan Bull

Dear KSI

Regarding your anticipated fight

You stated all creators may apply

A blatant lie

Your survey provided no way to say

If I was the preferred antagonist

To ram a fist into your face and why?

Dismayed I tried to rack my brains and find

An explanation, finally one came to mind:

"JJ is afraid to die"

Yeah he'd rather take a dive than face the guy

That makes the gaming rhymes

He'd rather stay inside today and hide away and cry

I'll be at the weigh in like

"I've been training day and night"

Bulking up my body weight with takeaway and pints

My massive girth will bring you back to earth, KSI

Cause mate, behaving like a God's a way of inviting deicide

It'll be over so quick we won't need to stream it

We'll just make a vine

You may rewind that to appreciate, take your time

The layers I can iron into shape

Require bare time

They hide the fact they're highbrow

Kinda like your hairline

When you were born the doctors thought

It was a diplodocus egg

My raps are like your bandana

Non-stop off the top of the head

I thought that Jack Douglass had a massive cranium

But yours is the reason we need a bigger capacity stadium

Last time you trained to raise your fitness up

At the gymnasium

They raised the alarm mistaking you for an invading alien

Maybe that explains the way you interact with ladies mate

Cause making "rapey faces" ain't really your saving grace

You're thinking that your baby face

Enables incorrect behaviour

Making mental illness jabs then play like you're their actual saviour

You're chatting vapour

It's no surprise your raps are bait bruh

So I'm afraid I'll have to roast you like a jacket potato

I know promoting fights involves a type of boastful gloating

But slow up on the showboating

Though don't go back to motorboating

Slow your roll before somebody draws on you

Rotoscoping

I don't know what this bloke is smoking as a mode of coping

Fame's a dangerous drug bruv, and JJ's overdosing

There's only so long you can go from rope a doping

I fight live weasels while showing no emotion

The local stoat enclosure's open if you want to go for coaching

This is the moment where I'm supposed to say

"I'm only joking"

But the oven gloves are off - prepare for total roasting

You'll need the strongest potions from the potion seller

I'm reaching deep beneath you see, call me the ocean dweller

Why you beefing with that Logan fella

When you know I'm better

And I'm ever so much more punchable

Than the Go Compare bruh

I'm never jealous of you well athletic OP fellas

So what that you could beat Joe Weller, I could beat Zoella

I tried to chat her up, she said I was a bellend

I snuck into the factory, hid a shiv inside her calendar

A different type of challenger

Won't fit inside your calipers

A different calibre

My talent's OP like your manager

I'm sending shivers down your spine with my vernacular

I can make you and Deji feud as if you are the Gallaghers

No matter how fast and savage you can throw a jab

It won't impact me through these massive fatty rolls of flab

Look, I'm an older lad, I'm out of shape and overweight

I'll beat the holy crap out of your hand with my nose and face

The blows will make your bones all break

Like sticks and stones and names

I'll eat you up for breakfast mate, call it the hunger games

I'll beat you at boxing, beat you at beatboxing

Beat you at unboxing

Beat you at hopscotch, sinking neat scotch from my lunchbox

Singing

I know you like to jump around but it's all smoke and mirrors

You need to keep up your flows and lyrics don't deliver

Like a postman with a broken rib that's trying to go to Kilimanjaro

In a Lamborghini, he won't be home for dinner

I don't really hate you JJ, I can't even get close

Friend and foe I hit both sides, call it a spit roast

I know twenty seventeen was the year of the diss track

But I'm bringing that shit back

And don't give a shit if I get flak

Cause I'm a master rap lyricist, while you just dabble

In disputing Bull, it's indisputable

I'll prove it using scrabble

HA

Imagine that in the ring

How mentally challenging

That would have been

I'm collecting anagrams of "The Nightmare"

Let me gather them in

Alright then me

Rah I'm the gent

Him, gent hater

The right name

The thin gamer

Meh, grin at the

Thane the grim

Reign hath met

Me threat nigh

Mr hating thee

He, me, that ring

Hear them ting

Rah, get him ent

That her minge

Ream the thing

He, might enter

The ring, am the

Hitter, hang em

Anger, hit them

Man get hither

Harm the gent

Near might the

Man here tight

Man he tighter

Than the grime

Genre that him

Rite hang them

High men treat

Him great then

Mean right then

Nth meagre hit

Harming teeth

Argh then emit

Methane right

'Neath the grim

Night heart me

Lies lyrics - Rockit Gaming & Dan Bull

(Among Us Animated Song)

[Rockit Gaming:]

You question what I have done

I see who you really are

Word is there's someone among us

Is it you? Is it me? We can't ever agree

'Cause your a madman with a bad plan

You've got them under your thumb, you're so demandin'

That's what impostors would say to make the truth go away

Don't point your finger at me, I wonder who...

Is it you? Who's the killer?

Is it me? I'm the killer!

Lies, tell me lies, who's been telling all these lies?

Is it you? Who's the killer?

Is it me? I'm the killer!

Lies, tell me lies, who's been telling all these lies?

Sound the alarm, we found another one

A ghost and half a body, might be what we all become

Gather 'round the table, let's discuss who we think is among us

Who not to trust...

So we got some clues to build off of

It's enough to find the impostor

What do we got to lose if we all accuse the wrong guy?

We'll need a good doctor

Let's breakdown what happened, the guilty are laughin'

We'll see through their cracks and disguise

Is it you? Who's the killer?

Is it me? I'm the killer!

Lies, tell me lies, who's been telling all these lies?

Is it you? Who's the killer?

Is it me? I'm the killer!

Lies, tell me lies, who's been telling all these lies?

Lies, lies, lies, who's been telling all these lies?

Lies, all these lies, lies, who's been telling all these lies?

[Dan Bull:]

I've got a sneaking suspicion

That this particular mission's gonna be bloody difficult, isn't it?

Because people are tricky, manipulative, and given any reason to kill they'll take the privilege

Are we deceitful, misleading, or evil? A little bit of each, though we're pleading our innocence

Wasn't me, well it could've been but if I did it, would I really be dumb enough to be admittin' it?

You can see the bits of the ship I've visited, and witness that it's clean, nothing suspicious, got rid of it

Now there's three of us living the predicament is picking whether he did it, she did it, or whether we did it

Can't trust you now, can't trust you now, can't trust you now, can't trust you now, can't trust you now, can't trust you now, can't trust you now!

[Rockit Gaming:]

Is it you? Who's the killer?

Is it me? I'm the killer!

Lies, tell me lies, who's been telling all these lies?

Is it you? Who's the killer?

Is it me? I'm the killer!

Lies, tell me lies, who's been telling all these lies?

Lies, lies, lies, who's been telling all these lies?

Lies, all these lies, lies, who's been telling all these lies?

Logan Paul Rap Roast (Rap Roasts #3) lyrics - Dan Bull

So, is anyone surprised to know that Logan Paul's

Uploaded a video that's broken social protocol?

Vlogging at a hanging scene as if it was the local mall

'Cause hanging with your bros and cracking jokes matters most of all

Is there ever an unspoken thought that doesn't pass that oaken jaw?

It's time to give this showman's mode of promo an overhaul

I'll rip your torso open raw, grip your pulse's frozen core

Shove it in the oven with the other leftover roasts to thaw

I thought you were the most mature and grown up Paul brother

You know, the secret favourite one of both of your mother?

I'm sure that you probably even disappointed Jake

But this is insignificant, there's an even bigger point to make

Real life isn't a video, not everything is content

The absense of a no doesn't equal consent

Some things are better left unsaid or unsent

Sometimes making the right choice might even lose you one cent

Once I filmed an accident, a jeep came off an overpass

Landed on another car below with an explosive crash

It could have been a hit on Reddit, but I didn't share it

'Cause there were real people injured and it didn't merit

Me exhibiting their tragedy like it was entertainment

So when I read you did the same I put my pen to paper

Not that it's my place to stick my nose in

But I'm getting sick of the excuses of those few who condone it

Saying "But he's already dead, he's not even aware of it"

That's true, but imagine if you were that fellow's relative

Logging on to see the news of your missing loved one

And seeing the noose and you giggling, it's just wrong

And the fact that you censored his face

Doesn't change the basic reason that you went to the place

You say you went to look for ghosts? Ghosts aren't real

But suicide is and those wounds can't heal

And if you can't feel you've overstepped a boundary

And if you can't say sorry without shouting "It's about me"

And if you can't comprehend the respect that you lost today

Then Logan bro, I don't know what to say

Your apology was hollow, a borrowed piece of sorrow

Hoping the drama would just become obsolete tomorrow

If you really meant to raise awareness of a thing this sensitive

How come the tags you added didn't even mention it?

Instead you picked the words "comedy" and "maverick"

So I'm sorry, but your apology? I'm not having it

Check your head and admit what you were there for

To disrespect the dead and the people that they cared for

You say you were in a moment of shock and couldn't cope with it

Is that the same moment you edited and uploaded it?

Filmed an extra bit, hyped it up and then promoted it

And at that time your mind was telling you to go for it?

Now there's no damn dispute you go for low hanging fruit

But this is still the lowest Logang's produced

Before this happened I was no fan of you

Suspected you were reckless, now I know that it's true

Mando lyrics - Dan Bull

(Star Wars - The Mandalorian Rap)

Mandalorian, Mandalorian

An abandoned stranded orphan

Who was found as a foundling handed all

He coulda handled, bounties coming out the walls

Standing tall

Joined the tribe, are you bound to fall

Upon the point of a knife if you're bountiful?

What's the point of living life without a calling

You can rely on?

Buy into the lifestyle of a bounty hunter

Neither light nor dark but a pale penumbra

Crawling out from under that rock

That his salvador found him under

Can't help but wonder what's under that helmet

Come on, if I can't have a look, can you tell me?

Mandalorian, can perform

For any tough crowd in carbonite, that's a captive audience

Keeping them alive in stacks

An actual people Filofax

Is he smiling behind the mask

Or is he keeping his mind on the task?

Eyes that'll flash behind the glass ever vigilant

Slide side to side and catch a vision

That didn't affect the less diligent

Jarring the legend, intelligent Din Djarin

Deleting dilly-dallying dilettantes

Who come around here

With delusions of grandeur

Like an off-brand Brando

If I'm honest, tell you what though

Mando's no Rambo, no Jango

No Django, no Holmes, no Rathbone

No Frodo, Han Solo, no Lando

No landowner, Mando's standing alone

When he goes commando

Goes hard on the eau de vie, tihaar, no hangover

No action figure, no Hasbro

Go Kenner or go home, that's a dad joke

Coming up out of the underground where my elders found me

They gave me their help, now I give it myself to secure that bounty

Accumulate wealth while I'm moving in stealth and I'm doing it well, see

You're stepping up onto a Mando, Mando, the Mandalorian

Mando, Mando, the Mandalorian

Mando, Mando, the Mandalorian

Mando, Mando, the Mandalorian

Same Kriff, different day

What is it they say? This is the way

No gain without significant pain

And no pain without significant pay

So if you can pay enough beskar

Then Din's up to take on a Death Star

His job satisfaction isn't surveyed

But getting the payment's the best part

Except ever since he met that kid

His head's been set to protect that kid

Sudden paternal urges overcoming the summoning murderous words

Of a certain Werner Herzog

Not gonna stop and just watch while the hurt him

Ain't no trading and negotiating over baby Yoda, taking over

Every waking moment, too cute, overloading your daily quota

Till your brain is broken like you're Ray Liotta

Aw, what a doting father

Breaking the briefs, gonna grief Greef Karga

Better briefly see the armorer

Then leave Nevarro for an even farther world

A motherland, another planet

Ducking underground to have the upper hand, understand it

Another mother's son but this man's gonna dad it, and I stan it

Because from experience loving a kid is as tough as obsidian, nothing's as good as it

What, give it in? Let Moff Gideon win

And give him the pleasure of getting all the dividends?

Nah, not happening

Like Din taking off his mask again

Splash, the empire was a wide ocean

Deep too, so keep your eyes open

My advice would be to find a visor

That is bifocal, both sides are focused

Everyone's out for their self in this hellscape failed state, society broken

Quietly hoping for their escape but they'll be devastated, I have spoken

Coming up out of the underground where my elders found me

They gave me their help, now I give it myself to secure that bounty

Accumulate wealth while I'm moving in stealth and I'm doing it well, see

You're stepping up onto a Mando, Mando, the Mandalorian

Mando, Mando, the Mandalorian

Mando, Mando, the Mandalorian

Mando, Mando, the Mandalorian

Minefield lyrics - Dan Bull

I've never been, I've never been that good at love

Try as I might, try as I might, I'll fuck it up

Let me talk to you for a minute

I try to find the right time to say the right line the right place

Eye to eye, eyes aligned with my face

It wasn't easy, taking that audacious step

How could I talk, when you took away my breath?

Feels like yesterday that you said yes to me

'Till our friends were there, then you rejected me

"I love you as a friend!" - you said condescendingly

Knowing full well you were more than a friend to me

You must see how much I respect you

No casual crush, just the lust to protect you

Sat here in tears probably doesn't affect you

I braved the storm only to get wet through

It's a rare occasion that I open my heart

To invite someone in, should've known from the start

Think it's only skin-deep? You don't know the half

I make no bones that it's blown me apart

My hopes were held up on the flimsiest scaffold

You kicked out my legs, watched the whole thing collapse

I've seen you go back to that loser who abused you

But you still think there's no way I can factor in your future

It reflects the mirror back on myself

As my image cracks, and that's bad for my health

You've loved fat twattish bastards as well

So why do I still have no chance in hell?

Whoops, I blew up another mine

But nevermind, I get up, and I'm fine

I'm not crying, something's stuck in my eye

I just want somebody I can tuck in at night

Whoops, I blew up another mine

But nevermind, I get up, and I'm fine

I'm not crying, something's stuck in my eye

Look, I don't suppose we could give us another try?

I've never been, I've never been that good at love

I'm not good at love

Try as I might, try as I might, I'll fuck it up

I fucked it up again

I've never been, I've never been that good at love

I'm not good at love

Try as I might, try as I might, I'll fuck it up

I fucked it up again

Whoops, I blew up another mine

But nevermind, I get up, and I'm fine

I'm not crying, something's stuck in my eye

Look, I don't suppose we could give us another try?

Whoops, I blew up another mine

But nevermind, I get up, and I'm fine

I'm not crying, something's stuck in my eye

It's tough to adjust, so I'll just say goodbye

I've never been, I've never been that good at love, love, love, love

Try as I might, try as I might, I'll fuck it up, I'll fuck it up

Mr. Brigitte Side lyrics - Dan Bull

(Overwatch Rap)

Brigitte, Brigitte, Brigitte, rah!

One by one, the heroes in this era, keep appearing

Rearing up from apprenticeships, and smashing through that glass ceiling

Mechanical engineering, what the hell is that "ting ting", you're hearing?

That is the sound of the beat, of the hammer and anvil, and heated up steel congealing

Forged in fire and flame, causing violent pain

Fortifying and multiplying, the likelihood of winning games

I can't describe the way you'll feel, when you meet her

Fearlessness of the meter, she's a steel señorita

Who's the shield wielding Sheila?, you're dealing with Brigitte

When she wails on you, with that flail, she'll be like "see ya Felicia"

From McCree to Orisa

Baptiste to Athena, and Lena, Fareeha

To Ziegler and D.Va, and Reaper

No being breathing's, as elite as Brigitte

They say the "the best defense, is an excellent offense"

Brigitte says "the best offense, is an excellent defense" (Well)

I say "wait, if the best defense and offense are the same, well then

This statement's tautologically extraneous excess" (What was that?!)

But Brigitte won't let that, get in the way of her success

In fact just shut your anal retentive face, lay that shit to rest (Mate)

Put it to bed, unless you want blood on your head

Look mate, this discussion's finished, so let's get some Guinness in the pub instead

Hanging out with Reinhardt, more than Stephane Grappelli

In the tavern, 'til they have an entire keg in their belly

Don't care if it's CAMRA certified, they're just there to get lairy

Get blind drunk, 'til it's time to say goodbye, like Andrea Bocelli, steady!

Smacking arses, with a massive rod above her

If that's not enough, she'll gladly drop another

Crafting armor's, like a badge of honor for her

Can't tell if she takes after, father or her mother

But only her daddy, is matching her blacksmithing skills

Rally round the family, with a pocket full of shields

She's shit hot with the whip shot, dealing out more batterings than a chip shop

Swiping these idiots, left and right, as if she was mixing up Tinder, and Tik-Tok

Wish I could see her in thongs, what's the matter, you sick fuck?, I meant flip flops

By the by, who'd have thunk, a bunch of nerds, would be bringing back lyricism into hip hop

Forged in fire and flame, causing violent pain

Fortifying and multiplying, the likelihood of winning games

I can't describe the way you'll feel, when you meet her

Fearlessness of the meter, she's a steel señorita

Who's the shield wielding Sheila?, you're dealing with Brigitte

When she wails on you, with that flail, she'll be like "see ya Felicia"

From McCree to Orisa

Baptiste to Athena, and Lena, Fareeha

To Ziegler and D.Va, and Reaper

No being breathing's, as elite as Brigitte

Brigitte, Brigitte

Get to know the rover, watch hero, one thing this one's Brigitte

Brigitte, Brigitte

Get to know the rover, watch hero, one thing this one's Brigitte

PewDiePie Rap Roast (Rap Roasts #2) lyrics - Dan Bull

I feel a little bad dissing a healthy wholesome Christian channel

It's gonna hit a nerve, like a dentist drill just split enamel

But if you listen out, you'll hear some sounds that I'll be saying

That'll get inside your brain and you'll never feel quite the same

Now, for the benefit of kids to whom I've not been introduced

I'm Dan Bull, a man who'll make you think, but using cringey tunes

It's like an interview, except that I rip into you

With rhymes and lyrics that'll get inside and sting like Vindaloo

But I'm just dissing you to get the views, Mr. Pewds

Unlike Onision, who is just rude, I can resist a feud

I pick and choose my victims like you pick your whiskey, dude

Just get a whiff of those big digits and I hit the booze

I'm getting sick and woozy sniffing the Hibiki fumes

Just give us a minute, consider this an interlude

While I nick your format and I twist it to "Get pissed you lose"

So if you do get pissed at this dispute, I guess you missed the truth

It's just a new and different route for me to redistribute

My criticism of big issues by which we're each affected too

These days it hits the YouTubes before it hits the news

That's why they're swift to try to get a libel hit on you

So I just sit amused at this dispute for which a truce

Is just as blooming likely as if finding that they print the truth

You dream of receiving a teabagging from G-Dragon

But I don't think he'll go for a skinny Swedish Steve Bannon

I'd tell you to delete your channel but I'd be here all night

Hold tight, you made a keyboard macro to be "alt right"

Oh my, did I just push your buttons? You're the touchy type

You could be right aligned, centre, left, but you're not justified

If I could underline the stuff that I'm disgusted by

You'd just see stripes across the writing like a crusty white piece of tiger bread

I'd like to peek inside your head

So I could see just why you said the things that people like to get offended by

Sometimes it seems just like they really like to be upset

But on the other side, there could be times that we forget

If you breathe a breath and move your lips about in certain shapes

It makes it tricky to discern if you're dispersing hate

I personally believe that you're a decent person, great

So don't feed your haters with an easy way to circulate beliefs that you're in league with a certain recent German state

It's like a skirmish in the street, it's not even worth it, mate

You got the Wall Street Journal hating, they should give you some credit

You made a way to monetise from browsing your own subreddit

Yeah, let the fans make the content and you just get it

Ad lib over the top of it, you barely even need to edit

Now this sounds callous, but well, I'm just putting it out there

You used to have your art in galleries and now you sell chairs

Your network dropped you, your net worth dropped, you

Could be better off trying to get work in a shop, you

Might as well just drop Vlogs, go back to selling hot dogs

And speaking of hot dogs, they're absolutely not pugs

Actually, I feel bad for saying that, I'll leave them out of it

Now, 'cause it isn't your pets' fault their daddy smells of fish

Anyone can set a Yeti on a desk and shout at it

Come to think about it, it's the thing I'm doing now, flip

Picking controversial topics out to get the mouse clicks

Except if I was you now, I'd take the Mick of Auschwitz

How many million Jews died, Pewds? About six?

I guess that's insignificant to your subscriber count, Felix

If anyone wants to break their contract with Maker Studios

Pewdie knows a new solution: Just make a stupid joke

But wait a blooming moment, Maker Studios are owned by Disney

The very same Disney that made this scene

That's still available for kids of any age to see

Hmm, I guess it's different when they're Asian clichés

It's double standards, plus it's underhanded business practice

YouTube will never give a slapped wrist over Disney's tactics

They're bringing too many views from useful demographics

While declaring bans on other channels, it's undemocratic

You'll never crack the algorithm, it's too enigmatic

To reach your own subscribers now, you'd better be telepathic

So I guess we'll never know, but on a level, though

I'm empathetic for the other fellows signed to Revelmode

You took them on your ship, then left them on an Archipelago

About as relevant as Leafy, saying "swag" and "hella dope"

You're breaking YouTube's safety policy, be careful, bro

No I ent, I'm just taking the P, look, Kwebbelko

Take the letters of PewDiePie and turn them to an anagram:

"I wipe deep", is there somethin' that you wanna tell me, man?

You've gone from looking like a cheap G-Dragon rip off

To someone the police'd need to speak to, they received a tip off

I see your beard growing, so excuse me for assuming

But a primary sign of depression is neglecting your personal grooming

Fumbling through the kitchen, trying to stick together crap meals

Drinking whiskey on your own at home, I know how that feels

I understand, man, it's a cry for help

These are deep feelings each and every guy has felt

I say you're suffering in silence, it isn't that obsurd

You were in the Ricegum diss track and didn't rap a word

Please Hammond Dont Hurt 'Em lyrics - Dan Bull

(Overwatch Rap)

Look at that hamster, damn

He's kind of a big wheel - Anchorman

Hammond's a mechanical animal for example

Like an album from Marilyn Manson, however more amicable, oh

He's a big mech battling ball

That'll swing that grappling claw

Have a think what that'll involve

Here's a clue - you'll be bruised, bloodied, battered and sore

Deploying shield with the minefield

So pen your final will, and get it signed, sealed, delivered

Then have a nice meal, finish and lie still

The last thing you're going to hear's a high squeal

Yeah, I know it doesn't seem quite real

When you're on the back foot like a high heel

That'll snap, you're no match for a stamp from a huge boot

Damn, but he's too cute

Hammond has only got one ball

The other does not exist at all

Hammond is less than one foot tall

But he's like a vinegar soaked conker conquers all

Hammond exemplifies

The Latin text: "semper fi"

But vivisectionists are pitiless

So forgive our friend for being a bit sick of this

It's as if he's infinitely stuck in a loop

Like a gif of the myth of Sisyphus

Shit's ridiculous, look, here's a lesson to take

Just because he's little doesn't make him any less of a brain

He was getting ready, and waiting to jet and escape

And that patience gave him success on a plate

Now specimen eight will never get in the cage again

He's ready to decimate, hit the Australian plains

Big ball energy

Want to do a bit more than gnaw celery

So quick, pour the Hennessy

Until it hits the floor in your memory

So let me provide a tissue for the final issue

'Cause when the piledriver hits you

I predict you won't survive, you'll be just goo

So goodbye, we'll miss you

Hammond has only got one ball

The other does not exist at all

Hammond is less than one foot tall

But he's like a vinegar soaked conker conquers all

Poppin (KSI Remix) lyrics - Dan Bull

My plumbin' be drippin' out water

Tap on, I wanna repair it

But I can't find a plumber to come and look at it

Because of corona, we don't wanna get it

I gotta spend a lot

Two-week waiting list on my grocery shoppin'

I need that loo roll today

Been usin' my naked hand to wipe my bottom

Call that the ploppin' challenge

Proper bellend

What's apparent's

That I got the talent

So you better not be tellin'

Anybody that I'm not 'cause I'll complain

More than a caucasian lady with a Bo

Yeah, watch it Karen

Ha, lethal, I damage you

Now, let me speak to your manager

Hold your government to account

Don't allow them to cause any balls up

Before this month, we were all in the pub

Now we're all subbed to PornHub

Can't get a haircut

Barbers? They're shut

Check my minimal new shoes, barefoot

Mayday, mayday

Amazon isn't delivering the same day

Ay, JJ

Less drip, more toilet roll, let's

Try wipin' your arse with a Rolex

Trust, it won't just be encrusted with diamonds

And I wonder why when women withhold sex

Got the whole wide world cock blockin'

By this point I'd... dot cotton

'Scuse me, can't stop coughin'

Should probably get checked

But I've not got the option

Why's it easier to get a disease

Than to be tested for the toxin?

Remember the days you could head off to Sainsbury's

Straight away and just pop in

Now I can't buy it

Guess I'm on a diet

So why's my weight not droppin'?

Could be 'cause I'm not movin' from day to day

I spent £200 on takeaways

Hey, it's aneasy mistake to make

But there's a way to change it up straight away

Look, mate

Till the other day I was a lazy sob

Now I don't want to come home from a daily job

Shit got me tossing salads

Appropriating things off Italians

Can't even get a spoonful of sugar now

That's the poppins challenge

Now try the lock-in challenge

Just stay in your fucking dwellings

Tucked up snug as a bug in your home

Or you could end up looking like Bugzy Malone

Bloomin' hell, I'm in trouble now

Couldn't help runnin' my mouth

Without dumbin' it down

Still, you kind of like my style

Kind of hate it

Hi mom, I finally made it

Me and my mom have been tight for ages

Come to think of it, we might be related

Anyway, I better be headin' away

I'm late for an appointment in bed, hibernatin'

But by the way, my name's Dan Bull

And I might one day replace Randolph

So I'd advise you to like and subscribe today

Let me provide my handles and channel

Boom

Boom

I can't stop singin' this bloody tune

Tune

Quiet Please! lyrics - Dan Bull

(Minecraft Warden Rap)

Sshhh

Quiet please, this is a library

And I'd like some peace to read mindfully

So mind your P's and Q's

Else you might receive abuse

When you let the wildest creature loose

See the blind leading you

Leave you slightly confused

Eardrums sliced, cleaved in two

Because my speakers blew

Due to highly frequent use

It's a nice evening to

Feel your life leaving you

You can try screaming futilely

I'd deem it foolhardy

I'll be here driving you doolally

R.I.P

Cursed and blessed with sensitive hearing

You can never guess what it ends up revealing

Goodness, yes, ever so queer things

Shudders and tremors and intimate feelings

Underhand, sinister, secretive dealings

Hidden amid all the weeping and wailing

Ears are piercing merely from squealing

Shrieking, screaming, bringing in ceilings

Sshhh, quiet please

Hush, hush, hush, hush, hush

Shush your mouth, don't make a sound

Whoops! You already have

And the Warden's been awakened now

Tut, tut, tut, tut

You just dug your own grave and fell

Down into a world of pain, all you can do is pray for hell

Darkness, closing in on all sides

I'd guess you're in for a wild ride

Chance is whether you live or die

You won't return and it's obvious why

Silence!

Can't you read the sign? Are you stupid?

Only I can vibe with the music

I'm not abusive

I'm a recluse with hyperacusis

Trying to unwind and I find you obtrusive

So now you find out how tiny my fuse is

Once you kids die then I'll find other uses for you

'Cause it's kind of amusing

Better stay quieter than ASMR

Or you may find why I'm a pain in the arse

I shout this straight from the heart

My ribcage is a stage that emits soundwaves in the dark

Like a flame from a spark

Creatin' a riot so loud that'll break you apart

Try not to raise the alarm if your aim's to evade any harm

Stay bloody calm

Maybe you can, maybe you can't

Maybe you'll try running straight to your mom

Go crazily hard when I blaze with the bars

Ay, kill a Blaze, get a bar

They say by this stage I'm basically blasé

Baby, but I say you're late to the party

Oh, hey! There you are, mate

Let's get straight to the part where I make you expire

In the deep dark, it's like a meat market

Believe me, it's not for the weak heartened

You might be somebody's dearly departed

When I leave your entire life restarted

Darkness closing in on all sides

I'd guess you're in for a wild ride (Aye, aye, aye)

Hush, hush, hush, hush, hush

Shush your mouth, don't make a sound

Whoops! You already have

And the Warden's been awakened now

Tut, tut, tut, tut

You just dug your own grave and fell

Down into a world of pain, all you can do is pray for hell

Darkness, closing in on all sides

I'd guess you're in for a wild ride

Chance is whether you live or die

You won't return and it's obvious why

You have the right to remain silent

And I have the right to remain violent

You have the right to remain silent

And I have the right to remain violent

Riding Down To Vice City lyrics - Dan Bull

(GTA VI Song)

I don't get excited particularly easily

But for ten long years, you've been teasing me

Now you're appearing all up on my TV screen

And all you're leaving is lines for me to read between

Uptown, downtown

Speeding all around

I'm spinning out

Can't even feel my feet up on the ground

Feeling cheap thrills ashore by the ocean

We don't need pills to cure our emotion

I've waited to play with you

I'm all out of patience

You turn me on like I'm a radio station

Never mind the manners and the niceties

We're riding down to Vice City

Palm trees, beaches, sea breezes, sights to see

And mami, I'm not stopping 'til it's my city

Uptown, downtown

Speeding all around

Getting naked with a 40's heaven

In this sort of town

Feeling cheap thrills ashore by the ocean

We don't need pills to cure our emotion

Life's hard, don't know how to give directions

I'm out doing donuts over intersections

Why you getting all hypercritical?

Hardly criminals, our crimes are minimal

We're party animals, aren't firing missiles

But I'm licking off full automatic rhyming syllables

Over here, oh my dear

You think you know loco?

Bro, hold my beer

Never mind the manners and the niceties

We're riding down to Vice City

Palm trees, beaches, sea breezes, sights to see

And mami, I'm not stopping 'til it's my city

Other cities have a Dark Knight or even Spider Men

But out here we got Leonida Man

That's all we need

Cheap thrills ashore by the ocean

Heat kills so pour on the lotion

Watch out when you're out there catching rays

Dog pound, you might just catch a stray

God damn, it's not exactly the land of the free 'cause someone has to pay

We don't assassinate

Foes evaporate

Coffee grounds wash down the aftertaste

Top down, that's the way we pass the days until we pass away

Never mind the manners and the niceties

We're riding down to Vice City

And I got V.C.P.D. vying for me

But papo, I'm not stopping 'til it's my city

Never mind the manners and the niceties

We're riding down to Vice City

Palm trees, beaches, sea breezes, sights to see

And mami, I'm not stopping 'til it's my city

Robocopyright lyrics - Dan Bull, Grandayy & Dylan Locke

It's difficult to picture some enemies

Unless we give them an identity

The newest entity we've got to fight

Is Article 13, I call it Robocopyright

I've been doing music on the net

For two flipping decades

Even before YouTube

On a Geocities webpage

And every time I see the regulations get changed

It's harder for creatives to make it

So yes I'm enraged

Look at my track record

I put a lot of time

Into coming up with tracks, records

And dropping rhymes

On the fight to democratise copyright

To shine a spotlight

On Anonymous and Occupy

I took a bit of time off

To rap about games

But now I'm back

And I'm not backing out again

Passing out castigations

And patting down your claim

No matter how you obfuscate

You rationale's insane

Maybe you'll get the picture

When I smack you out the frame

Because I don't want to see the internet

Blacking out for shame

But that's what's happening now

Yet again

A threatening mechanism

Checking on everything you say

All hail Robocopyright

Our great leader (Freedom)

I'd rather my router

Wasn't changed to rate meter

All hail Robocopyright

Our great leader (Freedom)

All hail Robocopyright

Our great leader

MEP's have voted

And I don't like their decision

I'd diagnose it as a nightmare condition

Of a quite rare position

Where we can't upload

Any kind of copyrighted clip

Without their permission

Now it's seems pretty good

If you just look at the surface

But peep under the hood

The engine isn't fit for purpose

And if we still don't trust AI and Teslas yet

Then pray why

Would we let it suppress the net?

And lest we forget

SOPA and ACTA

The digital economy act

And every tactic

The copyright lobbyists

Lob at us hobbyists

The obfuscating confidence tricks

Are pretty obvious

They make it sound like

It's benefiting small creators

To make them all successful

Ever more for all the ages

But look at labels

And the way they've always treated artists

If you can't see they won't change

You need new glasses

It isn't about creative control (nah)

It's about controlling creatives for cold cash

They want money for all robe

It's old hat

It's an old trope

Anybody could have told that

We've surrounded by constant IP

Imagine real life with Content ID

A conglomerate deciding what your eyes see

When there's nothing else left they'll copyright me

Why bother with a doctor?

You've got a faith healer

Acting like a god

But you're a lay preacher

Hey Jesus save me 'cause I don't need a gatekeeper (Freedom)

'Til I'm at the heavenly gates and meeting Saint Peter

All hail Robocopyright

Our great leader (Freedom)

You're never gonna drain the swamp

If you wade deeper

All hail Robocopyright

Our great leader (Freedom)

All hail Robocopyright

Our great leader

Do you trust the judgement of an algorithm?

To look at everything you touch and make a sound decision?

To value satire or parody and tell the difference?

Or controlled by copyright trolls we know they're well malicious

It's already tough enough to make a parody

Some of us have given up because of copyright brutality

Cash grabbing companies take money for morality

Knowing full well they're falsifying the legality

As if It wasn't bad enough already with net neutrality

They've done it again it's the definition of insanity

How can we trust a robot to know what it's permissible?

That only sees the content but context's invisible

It's risible, derisible, befitting of our ridicule

At least It would if the reality wasn't so miserable

Every single picture you submit will be conditional

Article 11's even restricting what is clickable

It's vulnerable to abuse commercial and political

Like unelected politicians slipping us rohypnol

So if you all care about it make people aware about it

Get on the phone get on the web get on the air and shout it!

All hail Robocopyright

Our great leader (Freedom)

Cutting off the trailers

So you can't see the main feature

All hail Robocopyright

Our great leader (Freedom)

All hail Robocopyright

Our great leader

It's difficult to picture some enemies

Unless we give them an identity

The newest entity we've got to fight

Is Article 13, I call it Robocopyright

It's difficult to picture some enemies

Unless we give them an identity

The newest entity we've got to fight

Is Article 13, I call it Robocopyright

Salty Seamen lyrics - Dan Bull

Wanker!

Oi, girls and boys and others, gird your loins you buggers

As I tell a story that'll appall the naughtiest of mothers

Get a load of this, you lubbers, here's what happens at sea

Though it hasn't been screened, for factual accuracy

They don't call me Captain Blue Balls due to testicular torsion

Although my quest for fortune's twisted with my sexual organs

I'm a legendary swordsman, never rest until I get me portion

And I suggest when you address me you use every caution

Or I'll have to let you pick which of your bloody legs be shortened

I recommend the middle one, would give the best proportion

Now set the course, head for better shores, and rest assured

I'll blow the man down, like a wind coming from west to north

Heave! Ho! We love to parley hard, yeah

We got a lot of qualities, none of them redeeming

We! Know! That we love a Jolly Roger

Blunder bussing a filthy load of salty seamen

Heave! Ho! We love to parley hard, yeah

Commit appalling acts of raw debauchery and treason

We! Know! That we love a Jolly Roger

Until your junk is flooded with salty seamen

Nobody knows how many ho's I've heaved, loads

I leave broken hearts and swollen ovaries whence I sow my seeds

Both at home on Dover beaches to far reaches overseas

And I don't believe I've ever even done it soberly

You can find me at the dock carousing, to the crack o' dawn

Cock a doodle doo, that cock's arousing you round the horn

We sail, leaving chaos in our wake, trails of jetsam, flotsam

Be warned, it's pouring up ahead fellas, get the coxswain

I haven't got any trousers on, bring me a pair of bottoms

It gets so hot in the poop deck I don't wear 'em often

We get robbing and covered in sweat, sodden

Every available man, come on the deck, swab 'em

Or I'll grab my Cat o' Nine Tails, tie 'em up and flog 'em

If the sea dog's naughty, then I'll shove another knot in

'Til he's singing like a nightingale, feeling like a knife impaled him

It's the kind of tale that happens every time we pirates sail

Heave! Ho! We love to parley hard, yeah

We got a lot of qualities, none of them redeeming

We! Know! That we love a Jolly Roger

Blunder bussing a filthy load of salty seamen

Heave! Ho! We love to parley hard, yeah

Commit appalling acts of raw debauchery and treason

We! Know! That we love a Jolly Roger

Until your junk is flooded with salty seamen

Avast! What's that across the horizon?

A vast mass of rugged rock is arising

Full of swollen bulging veins, imagine all the ores on that

Grab the oars, we'll have to drill a shaft, and fill up all her cracks

I'm bringing a massive swinging sack of big cannonballs

And I'm still considering in which hole to ram 'em all

Getting my hands on your booty is my true calling

X marks the spot, I'm gonna thrust my tool in

I meat a whaler that was out looking for sperm

Harpooned him in the blowhole, split him from stem to stern

I leave your timbers shivered, rearrange your guts

When I stick my dussack in your gizzards, see you later, nuts!

No cutlass needed to leave cut lads screaming

Orifices leaking body fluids, is he bleeding?

Whatever it is, he's feeling sore in every region

Got a problem with it? Well excuse me for breathing

Heave! Ho! We love to parley hard, yeah

We got a lot of qualities, none of them redeeming

We! Know! That we love a Jolly Roger

Blunder bussing a filthy load of salty seamen

Heave! Ho! We love to parley hard, yeah

Commit appalling acts of raw debauchery and treason

We! Know! That we love a Jolly Roger

Until your junk is flooded with salty seamen

Satisfactory Night Fever lyrics - Dan Bull

A lush and verdant land, a virgin unburdened by man

Untouched by dirty hands, unperverted by his plans

'Till suddenly a little metal seed lands

And plants itself in the ground, free to expand

I step out and see scenery teeming with greenery

We could be reaming this fricking thing with machinery

Such potential energy, machines can do the work of ten of me

And ten of them increase productivity exponentially

We're inflicting another industrial revolution

If you can't see the big picture, it must be your resolution

A thousand systems chugging in flawless cooperation

Absolutely funking shit up with ruthless automation

I'm only human, it's

Just what we do, innit?

Plunder this Eden and ruin it

Dump it under the sea, what a useful tip

Look at how my giant tool's

Sucking down that biofuel

Like a Dickensian boy on gruel

He should shop in aldi and buy in bulk

I'm a highfaluting, sky polluting

Mix of Richard Arkwright and Putin

Here to the horizon's ripe for looting

The resources that I require for producing

More stuff that I require for producing

More stuff that I require for producing

More stuff that I require for producing

What? I don't know, let's find the solution

I don't do this for mindless amusement

I am as ruthless as Isis recruitment

The environment leaves room for improvement

So 'scuse me, my guy, but would you mind moving?

I want to mine what's mine and remove it

Stripping the wild as if I was a nudist

It's innocent, childish to fight to reduce it

Let's find who can ruin the environment soonest

A thousand systems chugging in flawless cooperation

Making sure this planet's habitat never has overpopulation

A thousand systems chugging in flawless coordination

It's just occurred to me that I'm the alien invasion

I work you to death, then blame Ligma

Hey, just doing my bit to erase stigma

Gonna raise digbeth from a rocky plain

Got frames in stock and a stocky frame

I'm a fat cat, but don't body shame

Or you won't wash off that coffee stain

You'll look like you weren't potty trained

And you just came off of a hockey game

If I'm not being plain, that's a lot of pain

Use autotune, but I'm not T-Pain

I tune and tweak and chop and change

Into next week, you can not contain it

Chain reaction, a chain of contraptions

All calibrated for vein extraction

It's plain sailing, and I'm the navy captain

That's taking action, the main attraction

Waiting with baited breath for the day they patch in

A trade mechanism and a way to cash in

Look at my pay, reckon you could make a fraction?

Then you're dafter than letting wains stay with Jackson

A thousand systems chugging in flawless cooperation

Biology to technology's our final mutation

A thousand systems chugging in flawless coordination

It's just occurred to me that I'm the alien invasion

What has become of our industry?

Who's eaten all the biscuits and drunk my tea?

There's a deficiency in your level of efficiency

That I reckon significantly lessens your ability

To get in competition with me, so listen buddy

My suggestion is to quit this industry with dignity

Yes, I look at dictionaries, taking from them liberally

My system is to be proficient with every gift given to me

If I could, I'd make my videos completely effort free

Mixing up the topics that are trending with the evergreens

Green belt out, conveyor belt in

I'm an automated layabout, but hey, I'm 'bout to win

A thousand systems chugging in flawless cooperation

Absolutely fucking shit up with ruthless automation

A thousand systems chugging in flawless coordination

It's just occurred to me that I'm the alien invasion

Say No More lyrics - Dan Bull

Generic pleasantries and greetings, I'm pleased to meet you

Seriously, I'm gassed, man, you can read my meter

I've forever been a deep believer in being a people pleaser

Till recently, but I can see I've been an eager beaver

Now, I feel fatigued, and I really need a breather

I've agreed to play games with a whole heap of streamers

And a backlog of rappers impatient for me to feature

I still need to return eternity to Friedrich Nietzsche

I know, I couldn't believe it either

I don't mean to be like this, I guess I've got a weak demeanour

Meaning automatic acquiescing was my peak procedure

This is the kinda lesson teachers really need to teach you

Let me tell you something that I've observed, do me a favour

Sorry's really not the hardest word, try to be a little braver

Let me tell you something that I've observed because sooner or later

Sorry's really not the hardest word in the world, you're going to need to say no

When refusing any proposal, you could tell them to go swivel

Or show civility, this is your privilege, you know

Using an "n" and an "o", fusing that Eminem flow

With John Lennononononononononononono, no!

I'm always taking on more than I can handle

Agreeing to something then bailing, that's so Daniel

My to-do list's useless, so big that it's a bit absurd

So I'd better learn to use that two-letter word

Before I run out of options and I've got nowhere left to turn

Prematurely spent every penny that I could earn

That path to happiness may not be paved with dollar signs

So it may be time for your behaviour to be modified

Don't apologize for what you prioritize, huh

My God, it's time that I took my own advice

To decline is a right you can exercise

And on that note, request denied

Let me tell you something that I've observed, do me a favour

Sorry's really not the hardest word, try to be a little braver

Let me tell you something that I've observed because sooner or later

Sorry's really not the hardest word in the world, you're going to need to say no

When refusing any proposal, you could tell them to go swivel

Or show civility, this is your privilege, you know

Using an "n" and an "o", fusing that Eminem flow

With John Lennononononononononononono, no!

I've had enough of office politics, that stuff is full of tricks

That's another thing on the list, I've gotta fix

I try to keep it in check, but that's a lot of ticks

I need to be selective when it comes to what I pick

So shove your office politics up your orifice

It's been blimming donkeys since I've been on any holidays

But I hope this thing's alerted any folk that's introverted

Don't think the being reserved means you serve the whims

Of certain convincing persons versed in being coercive

There's nothing worse so let's bring that little word in

And if anyone pretends they haven't heard it?

We'll shout it louder till their eardrums are busting

Let me tell you something that I've observed, do me a favour

Sorry's really not the hardest word, try to be a little braver

Let me tell you something that I've observed because sooner or later

Sorry's really not the hardest word in the world, you're going to need to say no

Somebody Call A Doctor! lyrics - Dan Bull

Ay, look, uh, yeah, I'd like to make an appointment please, I need a doctor, no, not Doctor Dre, an ac- an actual medical doctor please

Ay, this song's kind of like a doctor's appointment

I made it for my welfare, not for enjoyment

The current state of healthcare's gotten fairly poignant

Employment in the NHS is stress and disappointment

Plus regarding these doctors and nurses

There's a large divide between what their cost and their worth is

What they're giving us is not just customer's service

Thus I'm not certain what they've done to deserve this

And I know economically there's not often a surplus

Especially with Tony Crony stock that we purchase

It's like the coffers are coffins dropped in a furnace

Gosh, it must have just got lost under the surface

Observing those at the top's like watching a circus

Of obnoxious impervious toffs that are discourteous

Not fussed what we eat, they just scoff their desserts up

And really couldn't give a toss if it hurts us

They've got the moral virtue of a disturbingly damp sock

Let me just take a second to say - fuck Matt Hancock!

And fuck Boris Johnson! There's nothing of his conscience

Not because he's competent, but 'cause he's over confident

He's not a plonker, he's an avaricious wanker

Ask a question different days, you'll have a different answer

Abandoned his kid that he had with a mistress

That just goes to show that it isn't the kid, that's the bastard!

Jesus, fuck! Fucking shit!

Somebody, call a doctor, quick!

Fuck this shit! What the fuck?

Somebody, call a doctor up!

Jesus, what the fuck is that?

Somebody, call a doctor stat!

What the hell? Fucking wow!

Somebody, call a doctor now!

I'm a rapper without purpose, stacking up countless verses

Tracks queued like patients in the National Health Service

My playlist is a waiting list I made to pass the days to death

I'm praying that it's painless, then remembered I'm an atheist

Would you actually look at the state of this?

Can you imagine your taxes bloody paid for this? Crazy shit!

Sorry, I didn't want to be ableist, today

But it just gets straight under my skin, it's subcutaneous

Look at this great big list of miscellaneous failures

Is it incompetence, corruption, or plain flippin' laziness?

Follow the dollar trail, there's obviously some shady shit

The misappropriation of our Great British safety net

Maybe if we necromanced Clement Attlee back

He'd save us, but sadly these days, it ain't what labour is

See, it's karma, all I see is Kier Starmer

In a sea of parliamentary sharks appeasing big pharma

He's a real charmer until he'll disarm you

With a demeanour that appears harmless like a meaner Shere Khan does

Of only Tony Benn was here, he'd be a father

To our social care, and sheathe it in a coat of steel armour

You know who's slightly overrated? Mister B Obama

Clear killing civilians with drones, he's a real bomber

Told us he'd close Guantanamo Bay

So why the hell is it still open today?

I know that's not remotely related to the topic of this track

But it's a fact, I just, you know, needed to say

Stop idolising people, at most you guys are equal

Then you won't be so surprised when finding that they're evil

I wish politicians weren't such a fucking obstacle

Look at them putting hospitals under mobster rule

Hey, I just remembered this is a G-funk bop

So I better start popping off my Glock pistol

Jesus, fuck! Fucking shit!

Somebody, call a doctor, quick!

Fuck this shit! What the fuck?

Somebody, call a doctor up!

Jesus, what the fuck is that?

Somebody, call a doctor stat!

What the hell? Fucking wow!

Somebody, call a doctor now!

Mixing up nasty flows with the Hippocratic Oath

Giving the government such an intimate exam, it needs a chaperone

Hammer home that reflex test until I shatter bone

And they're wailing like an eighties solo on a saxophone

Fact is I'm just sat alone, chatting through your gramophone

The evidence that I present is anecdotal, and I'm hopeful

That you know better than just believing any bloke who's speaking

In a manner that suggests he knows something any deeper

Than a medical professional, credentials are respectable

However, it's always essential that you check the source

Like you check your balls, you need to squeeze the whole testicle

Know when to consult professionals, or to be skeptical

Don't recommend you take this track as medical advice

Because I'm just inventing anything I like

Like a fake war veteran who's never been in fights

But pretending that he'd die for his fellas by their side

Our leaders treat the NHS as benefit in kind

They're rarely fit for purpose, yet they never just resign

Just keep telling us it's fine with a repetitious line

They prepared for television baring their malicious mind

Sneaky underhanded wicked venomously vile

Steal that advantage with a devilish delight

Peel back the bandage, the infection in its rife

It seems the medicine cabinet has some skeletons inside

Jesus, fuck! Fucking shit!

Somebody, call a doctor, quick!

Fuck this shit! What the fuck?

Somebody, call a doctor up!

Jesus, what the fuck is that?

Somebody, call a doctor stat!

What the hell? Fucking wow!

Somebody, call a doctor now!

Saying for the considerably funky ambulance, oh my god, imagine, hahaha, imagine an online ambulance, the hydraulic, hah, bouncy up and down, hahaha, patient in the back just uh, uh, we have fun, we have fun that we

Squid Game (Red Light, Green Light) lyrics - Rockit Gaming & Dan Bull

[Rockit Gaming:]

Red light, green light, inside it's fight or fright

I might decide to kill a friend tonight

Because in hindsight I would've died

But I got blindsighted by the time

Like a high tide, up to the sky

Then I put my knife right into your thigh

What, what did I get into?

Hit the bottom of my issues

And I think, into the deep, I sink

Sealed with blood and ink

What, what did I get into?

I'm an addict, and I'm afraid of myself and what I can do

And I'm not safe, I'm not safe in Hell

I'm an addict, and I'm afraid of myself and what I can do

And I'm not safe, I'm not safe in Hell

Red suits, can't stand to lose

Need an excuse to avoid the rules

Let loose 'til we break in two

But I'm confused, need a friend to choose

Tuggin' on that rope like hope I don't die

Push 'em off that bridge while some tiles aren't right

Hungry for the money, my life's on the line

And I see raindrops and they're comin' down, weren't always enemies

Who's it gonna come down to? Who's it gonna be?

Offer up an end for two, guess we're gonna see

What, what did I get into?

Hit the bottom of my issues

And I think, into the deep, I sink

Sealed with blood and ink

What, what did I get into?

I'm an addict, and I'm afraid of myself and what I can do

And I'm not safe, I'm not safe in Hell

I'm an addict, and I'm afraid of myself and what I can do

And I'm not safe, I'm not safe in Hell

[Dan Bull (Rockit Gaming):]

Surrounded with folk, but I'm low-key lonely

Lot of pink guys, but I don't see Joji

Only hope we can each go home

At the close of the show, but I know we won't be

Each day brings new surprises, new ways to euthanize us

Reducin' the line to a few survivors

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes

Used to be cash, now it's life that I'm gambling

In a land you won't catch sight of an ambulance

Nobody's gonna give you their hand to guide you

Through the labyrinth, this isn't that kind of gathering

You've got a better chance of finding Madeline McCann

Hindin' inside of a giant yellow mannequin

I'm gettin' manic and I'm panickin' again

How can I be the man that's getting credited again? (I'm an addict!)

At the end credits, so many are dead and we're reduced to one

We see director, producer, editor, executioner, it's hallucinatory

The way they choose to take their lead (I'm an addict!)

So you better watch your back at night

Now shut up and watch the traffic light

Before you stop and then catch a sight that'll result in a lifelong loss of appetite

[Rockit Gaming:]

I'm an addict, and I'm afraid of myself and what I can do

And I'm not safe, I'm not safe in Hell (What, what did I get into?)

I'm an addict, and I'm afraid of myself and what I can do

And I'm not safe, I'm not safe in Hell (What, what did I get into?)

I'm an addict, and I'm afraid of myself and what I can do

And I'm not safe, I'm not safe in Hell

The Emperor's Light lyrics - Dan Bull

(Warhammer 40,000: Lost Crusade Rap)

Darkness, closing in on all sides

I guess, we're in for a wild ride

Chance is, whether we live or die

We will return, to the emperor's light

We gaze on a blazing Cadia, and the remains, of they who stayed there

We'll take this to the great rift, crusade against invaders here

If there's a beaten path, we'll stray off, 'til we've beaten back the chaos

In an aggrieved imperium, only the really grievous tactics pay off

We've strolled so far, from Ultramar, we might just fall apart

Hope those bolts will hold, and won't just blow, like Bolter blasts

False alarm, of course we'll force your arm, and cause some harm

On course, to fill corroded souls with holes, like some unholy autograph

Giving scars, to the darkest of Eldar, killing Drukhari, for Marneus Calgar

Certain angels are dark, and have fell far, but we're still fighting, with half of our health bar

No healing baths, for the shell shock, this rift's pretty far from a health spa

At most, no stars on hotels, our apartments are just kind of a cell block

Is that a battle barge

Or in fact a massive Travelodge?

Hear the battle cry of a natural god

I can ride no handle bars

Battle scarred, I've battled hard

Putting Maggotkin back in the tackle box

Like an atom bomb, to a cattle prod

My knack for rhyme's, an actual farce

Darkness, closing in on all sides

I guess, we're in for a wild ride

Chance is, whether we live or die

We will return, to the emperor's light

They are, tearing holes through our hull

Chaos, like a bolt to a skull

Pray now, that our resolve will hold

'Til we're nothing but a floating hulk

These watchers are heartless, see us lost in the darkness, for real nothing can startle us

The fleet suffered losses, and countless of us are carcasses, officers downed

While hostiles surround us, we're indomitable, these are just common encounters

We will not run aground, you'll hear historiters tell of us, chronicles troubled with doubt

But one thing is obvious now: we're the ones you struggle without

For forty-one thousand orbits around Sol, we'll assault 'til the warp is our realm

'Til the souls of our foes all drown, or fall to the ground, it's our ultimate vow

We're the Ultramarines, the emperor's sword is unsheathed

On any unfortunate beings, resulting to means, that insult or demean, our dearest leader

You'll feel the fear, as fleets of soldiers elite, appear from Ether

Peer beneath the sole of your feet, and see the ground just melt around you

A planet's skull is weak, but the soil beneath it is bounteous

So count your blessings, lest you get a dressing down, form Adepta Sororitas

Intercepting heretical horrors, prevent them assembling followers

The sisters of battles' particular knack, is for pimping out tanks, into Sistine Chapels

Similarly, send me sixteen smilies, I'll send back sixteen pristine raptures

Fear not, there's a reason we were sent here

Xenos, and Ezekyle's demons needing censure

We will, never sleep, never surrender

We'll keep defeating heathen legions, if it please our dear emperor

Darkness, closing in on all sides

I guess, we're in for a wild ride

Chance is, whether we live or die

We will return, to the emperor's light

Will war and terror be, all you ever see?

It's been this way, since the Horus Heresy

Even in space there were walls of enemies

The more the merrier, bring them all, I'm ready chief

We're done with talking, send a couple of Thunderhawks in

Come on, we're going to lunge at Gork's Grin, and shove a cork in

We brought in reinforcements, the important names of ages

Whose stories of warding Horus's forces, adorn the Black Library's pages

Are we giving up? Not today, one last shot through the lost crusade

This ship will rip through the rift, like a whip to a wrist, or a moth through flame

Who the man? Guilliman, barely human now

Mother Nature's screwed, no pulling out

Run around, killing the Tyranid, T'au

Fill them with rounds, whatever they're giving, we're giving it out

Never giving in, doesn't matter whether or now

We're like imperial fists, digging and giving them hell

Sticking it out without trigger discipline, trigger finger blistering, ow

It's a mystery, how the flipping hell we're still about, still in the bout

While they're ringing the bell, we stick around, stick to our ground

No dicking around, we're going to get out the predicament, amid a thickening cloud, of sickening sound

So you better be listening out, particularly well

Else you'll be missing out, wow, flipping hell

Who is the emperor's chosen poet? Well now, there isn't any doubt

Darkness, closing in on all sides

I guess, we're in for a wild ride

Chance is, whether we live or die

We will return, to the emperor's light

Darkness, closing in on all sides

I guess, we're in for a wild ride

Chance is, whether we live or die

We will return, to the emperor's light

The End Of The Line lyrics - Dan Bull & The Stupendium

(Choo Choo Charles Song)

Sleeping deep beneath the sleepers of the isle

There's a demon creature dreaming, heathen and reviled

Sees no rhyme or reason but for feasting when he's riled

Better let him be, lest you are sure to see the smile

Of sixteen tons of scurrying death

Smoldering souls through funnel of red

With a pick-like grin on the front of his head

Sat atop a most illogical number of legs

Tickets, please! Let me tell you the tale

Of a wicked beast, that'll follow your trail

Through the valleys and vales, on your tail day and night

There'll be chaos on the rails when the railway strikes

Stop, take stock, try to gauge the situation

'Fraid your train has been derailed, there's no use waiting in the station

Every engine's been dismantled, there's no other service coming

Charles is leading by example, he's the only train that's running

All in all, we're in a doozy of a mess

So, all aboard the WTF express

Should you want to stay safe, then I wouldn't play games

Or you'll learn another way of saying, "Run away! Train!"

Every life has a light in the tunnel ahead

But you might just find that behind it instead

Of a heaven is an engine and the devil inbred

And we're next on the menu if we've left him unfed

Charlie

Your timetable says it's almost time for tea

Charlie

And we've laid on quite a spread, as you can see

There's a choo-choo train

Coming after you

Food chain's

Gone a bit askew

Won't catch that train

If it's gonna catch you

For certain worse than what they say to mind the gap for

The train's not just cancelled, it's damn well deplatformed

Since it scampered off the tracks to find a snack from off your back lawn

Couple jackdaws and your cat and then your dad from off the back porch

He's hungry and he's hunting down the islanders

With a side of any siding-hiding bystanders

Quite queer what his dietary requirements are

But it's pretty clear regardless he's a dining car

Coke? Coal? Petroleum? Alone they'll never do

No, this engine sends the scent of rendered flesh out from the flue

On this service we'll be serving something rather more unnerving

Chugga-chugging on blood as he chew-chews you

It's all true, choo-choos consume fuel too

Humans are a whole new consumable and whole food

Gluten free range and more renewable than coal too

So, who to choose to chew to this tune? Ooh, you'll do

Every life has a light in the tunnel ahead

But you might just find that behind it instead

Of a heaven is an engine and the devil inbred

And we're next on the menu if we've left him unfed

Charlie

Your timetable says it's almost time for tea

Charlie

And we've laid on quite a spread, as you can see

Charlie

If we sate your lust for flesh on which to feed

Charlie

Will you promise to eat them instead of me?

There's a choo-choo train

Coming after you

Food chain's

Gone a bit askew

Won't catch that train

If it's gonna catch you

Engine, engine number nine

On the Aranearum mining line

If your train comes off the track

Better run, better run, or you won't come back

Hey, guess who! This is déjà vu

Like HS2, you'll be railed right through

Penetrated in the vein of a mainline route

When we come, well then, we're gonna run a train on you

You might say we've got a loco motive

To provide the train with a load of groceries

Locally sourced from the local folk, dear

Granny's s'posed to host, although she's toast when the smoke clears

The el choo-choopacabara, the beast come to dine

And it's far worse than leaves that he leaves on the line

You'll see when he feasts in the deep of the night

By the pieces of people-y debris left behind

Riding off-peak? Don't be ridiculous

The worth of your season ticket is

Quickly diminishing with every pillock

We're feeding into his gleaming scissorous teeth

But if we seem insidious

We're just uneasy villagers

Seeking to keep the most hideous beast

We unleashed from committing the deed of killing us

If killing a priest, a vicar, a grocer or postman or three is villainous?

Well, what's it to me? You probably see the feast is imminent

Keep on screaming, pump the bellows, he'll be drawn to your duress

Charlie loves a little murder on the goriest express

You can ruminate on whether there's a certain train near

Or pray that it's a rumour made to circulate fear

But in case you didn't hear then I better make clear

This train terminates here

Every life has a light in the tunnel ahead

But you might just find that behind it instead

Of a heaven is an engine and the devil inbred

And we're next on the menu if we've left him unfed

Charlie

Your timetable says it's almost time for tea

Charlie

And we've laid on quite a spread, as you can see

Charlie

If we sate your lust for flesh on which to feed

Charlie

Will you promise to eat them instead of me?

There's a choo-choo train

Coming after you

Food chain's

Gone a bit askew

Won't catch that train

If it's gonna catch you

The False God lyrics - Dan Bull

(Battle Spirits Saga Rap)

I'm very good at various things, listen

I'm known on seven continents

For the most card decking competence

Got to get that green thing

Whatever the frog it is

Wait a sec, what breed of dog is this?

A little bird told me, he does not exist

I flow from the top like a waterfall descending

Ooh, what a horny penguin

I'm the one on whom it's all depending

I'm deep in the lore, you're pretending

You've never seen anything like this, irreverent guy, his

Pebbles are the size of an elephant with elephantiasis

You have any ideas

How better my life is, now that I'm the nicest?

I'm getting the prizes, if anything, I just

Stand out from the crowd like I'm wearing a high-vis

These shining diamond things keep rearriving

Me thinks they might be the key to surviving

Oh, they're called cores

According to the subtitling

How convenient that beneath there's some writing

I don't need it, but it's nice for beginners just arriving

The innocent kind that generally find

This demon is frightening

I don't, I'm unmatched at Battle Spirits

Can't believe those are actual lyrics

You don't even need to ask who did it

Rapping faster, pushing the track past the limit

Pulling you out of the pack

Shoving you back in the trash

Until you run out of attacks

Within a matter of minutes, I've finished

You haven't even seen Dan begin

And he's already the champion

You haven't even seen Dan begin

And he's already the champion

Mid, mid, capable being can't be bothered

The God Father lyrics - Dan Bull

(Kratos & Atreus Song)

Quick, come in, and hold your shoulders up, we're in for a winter

Cold enough to split skin cause your fingers to splinter

Flick the flint to the tinder, and then the tinder to timber

If we don't protect the cinder, then the wind'll extinguish the glimmer

The only glint of hope we hold growing dimmer and dimmer

And so we bring it close enough to cling to it and shiver

You're an innocent kid, but old enough to know this

You're growing up so quick, I didn't even notice

And look at you - a future king, a truly beauteous thing

Took you under mine, but now it's time for you to use your wings

My finest student's tutoring is due to finish soon

And then it's lunar, moving with the moon, a new beginning looms

There is a luminance in you no human can eclipse

So is it stupid to assume you'll fill my shoe then if it fits?

Like a glove, my love for you's so huge, I better get a grip

Feel the music as it hits, build the tune up, let it rip

Whatever feats I have achieved

Whatever deeds I've done

Will never leave a legacy

Compared to thee, my son

Eventually, even chilly winter will give in to spring

Into summer rise and fall before revisiting

What is a king to a god but kindling?

And what's a god to a son for whom his father would do anything?

What godly gifts I'm given, hardly makes a difference

I'm hardwired with this fatherly disposition, it's my mission

To provide the kind of love that does not come with condition

My son, whatever sin's committed, trust, it's forgiven

Listen, you and I are riffing to a different rhythm

Rune rifted rock will outexist any scriptures written

See, even if I'm gone, you'll have your father by your side

Keeping your heart strong, from afar, look on with pride

Provide a reason to go on, and take the hardship in your stride

However far you want to ride, I'll be right behind

And though you might not need your father, your father needs his son

And so I will march farther 'till the final deed is done

Whatever feats I have achieved

Whatever deeds I've done

Will never leave a legacy

Compared to thee, my son

Good god, I've always thought myself a bad god

But perhaps I'm a good dad, I've got the dad bod

Before my lad, I was sad, savaged by the black dog

Just trying to ignore it, gnawing at me like a Hamhock

No matter what path I trod, it followed the tracks I dropped

But now I've found what I lacked, I lost the last of what was

Pulling me down, it's just my son and me now, and that's your lot

And if I have to, I'll follow him down to Ragnarok

Whatever feats I have achieved

Whatever deeds I've done

Will never leave a legacy

Compared to thee, my son

Together we will weather each

And every grief to come

For though I leave a legacy

I'll never leave my son

Whatever feats I have achieved

Whatever deeds I've done

Will never leave a legacy

Compared to thee, my son

The Hunter Becomes The Haunted lyrics - DK & Dan Bull

(Phasmophobia Rap)

Hunt, kill, hunt, kill

Hunt, kill, hunt, kill

Hi, my name's Daniel Robinson

I'm the ghost that's been haunting your house

I'm seventy seven years old

I was murdered and butchered right there on the couch

I hear you calling my name

And I sure as hell wouldn't be running my mouth

I could be a spirit, a banshee

A demon, but I'm never leaving, that's without a doubt

You ask me to give you a sign

So I throw shit around and start ringing the phone

You and your mum have got something in common

'Cause both of you look around for a bone

Don't let me catch you alone

You should be watching your tone

I hear you scream bloody Mary again

Then I'm coming and hunting you down

And I'll rip out your throat

I see you with the EMF

You're seeing three at best, and five is what you're pleading for

Standing round in freezing temps

You start to see your breath, you place a cam to see the orbs

All this trouble for a check

You're betting me your neck for pictures of a ouija board

Holding up the crucifix

You start to disrespect, I'm sending you to see the Lord

I'ma start draining your sanity

When I can hunt you the front door is getting locked

I'm gonna tell you I'll kill you

You're meeting your death if you talk through a spirit box

Torch get to flashing when I come to torture you

And if I catch you you're getting dropped

Watch when I send you a threat through my ghost writing

You know my hunting will never stop

Hunt, kill, hunt, kill

Hunt, kill, hunt, kill

Hunt, kill, hunt, kill

Hunt, kill, hunt, kill

Hi, my name's Daniel Bull

I'm the bloke who's been brought to this house

A professional skeptical secular exorcist

Recommending that you ought to get out

I'm calling your name, I'm intending to render you

Into a theory disproved

I'm just bopping to the ominous knocking in here

Because it's the eeriest groove

Did you think that I'd really be spooked?

Be serious dude, I'm clearly just too

Inexperienced to really feel the fear some idiots do

Delirious douches, are all like, "Believe me, it's true

It's seen them, it's proof" yeha, and I'm Jesus to boot

If I'd be in your shoes I'd be leaving here soon

'Cause I'm cleaning the rooms of your footprints

Even when I'm in the silliest mood

I'll be seeing this through and removing corruptions

Pull up floorboards and of course there's a corpse

Of a husband that's been causing disruption

Where are all my hot demon bitches?

This is all I need, a dead pensioner

There musta been a Victorian whore in the bedroom

At some point hence, I should mention her

Feel the tension, I'm watching phenomena

On my spectrometer's flickering screen

Feel a shiver but I'm not afraid

It's the radiators that could do with a bleed

My position's apparition abolition

I feel it's done so I dash for the kitchen

Drat, I didn't bring a bag of ammunition did I?

No, don't cut the transmission

The Naked Mole Rap lyrics - Dan Bull

Oi you're about to learn about

The fucking naked mole rat

Fuck all the other animals

They're old hat

I'm bringing solid gold facts

And I'm not gonna hold back

It's a whole new genre

I'ma call it naked mole rap

Check it one two, check it

One two, check it

They're not rats or moles

They're not rats or moles

But they're definitely nekkid

I know they look scarily like 'em

But they're not dicks

Dicks don't move their teeth

Independently like chopsticks

Looks can be deceiving

'Cause they're anything but soft

If they were then they probably

Wouldn't be feeding their tots shit

Or sleeping in a moshpit

Like narcoleptic rock chicks

Blinder than a bat

But they don't even need their optics

'Cause they can smell a rat

Like he just lit a joss stick

Live long in tip top condition

Hear the clock tick

You're jealous of these hairless fellas

So follow this top tip

You mess with them and it'll hurt

Like you fell on your coccyx

Unlike the puny human brain

These dudes are just immune to pain

Run straight into the fray

Like you'd do in a computer game

Who's afraid of rufous snakes

That move to break into the place

When you can take a tooth into the face

And be like, "Who's this wasteman,

Ruining the mood in our communal space?"

Like Luda says, move bitch

Get out my fooking way

Their food is basically

Just super great big new potatoes

Saying I can't communicate

How beautiful this tuber tastes

I never want to brush either tooth

Don't need a tube of paste

Plus they run the red light district

Check the zoo displays

So best watch your step in the neighborhood

Of heterocephalus glaber cuz

Or you'll be made to change your name

To a new one like Bethany Davis does

Beware 'cause they're braying for blood

And they're ready to cripple a crip

It's as if you were Dre and they're Suge

What? you thought this was,

A hereditary monarchy?

Nah, the queen hustled hard

And took over the colony

Survival of the fittest

This is what she's good at

Rising up the ranks

By fucking up the other hood rats

These OGs roll deep

Up to three hundred soldiers

Each keep to their role

In the mole fleet

But this isn't Sparta

This is modern day Somalia

So if there's pirates hearing this shit

You aren't so hard are you?

They live in massive burrows

As big as actual boroughs

They're sabre-toothed sausages

That's David fricking Attenborough

These crafty buggers

Are the only mammal packing blood

That's cold so they're literally

Cold blood bastards, that's another fact

They're as good at back up

As running forward

From the sound of it

They run the underground

That's blooming baller

Let me tell you something awful

Old age is coming for you

And it's unavoidable for us

But your boys are immortal

Oxygen's an option

They can take it or leave it

They safely respirate

In places apes couldn't breathe in

And have you ever seen

A naked mole rat getting cancer?

No you haven't so don't try

To give a different answer

Have you ever had the thought

How the name "naked mole rats"

Sounds like a Kevin Smith parody

With an adult cast

Mother nature baked these babies

Up on full blast

And any lame attempt to be greater

Than them'll fall flat

So fucking fall back fool

Before you feel the full wrath

Of the motherfucking

Buck naked mole rats

This is a rap

About the naked mole rat

In case you didn't know already

And so I guess that

I just have to name it

The naked mole rap

It's a pun

This is a rap

About the naked mole rat

That's fairly obvious

And so I guess that

I just have to name it

The naked mole rap

The naked mole rap